too close to home!

Something came to my attention, that i have never had to deal with personally. Something that i always heard others have or taken care of but, i thought i have finally gone through enough, then it hits. My good friend jean, has come down with breast cancer, She has to have both of them removed on friday, It has currently also gone to her lymph nodes. so the doctors don't think it is very good, and that she possibly couldn't be looking at a terminal cancer situation. all with in a week, to find out,get tests, surgery, recover, then possibly not make it! I don't think she has realized it or accepted and i know i haven't either. it is just so much. since she doesn't really have anyone, i am going to go with her on friday, and she will be in mt. vernon at their cancer center, so i will only be 10 minutes away. hopefully she can get a hole of jerei soon, so maybe he can come up and support her and keep me company. i just don't think i am ready to loose her, i have come to know her as a friend, mother, and even though we haven't really been that close in the last couple of years, i just don't know if i can handle it. i know i can but, i don't want to. this record of loosing someone close every 2 years, well, it might keep on track. i doh't like it, but they happen, it's like you can feel it, gosh that's horrible, i couldn't imagine, not having her to talk to ,yea know, and not even close to imagine how she must feel, she has alreay gone through so much in her life, she deserves, to have it good, once ya know and be relaxed. i just hope the tests come out better than she thinks and it will all be over soon and she can get on with her life. i love her like a mom and feel like being selfish, ya know. okay i will keep you updated and maybe i should just call jerei myself and have him call her!