Thursday, June 14, 2007
WHAT?
ok... i am fed up with people being hypocritical. we all need to work on being open with each other. if someone has a problem with what i am about to say, they you know what. too bad, these are my feelings of some issues i believe need to be surfaced. first of all i am tired of people talking behind other people's backs. it's bullshit. and i am tired of people stressing our about stupid shit, when they don't even have the facts straight. i hate being in the middle of shit. but i also have a tendency to want to make things straight and okay with everyone. so forgive me if i happen to step on anyone's toes. because it is my belief that we should all be allowed to state how we feel even if it is negative. we have to learn how to make it better. but god damn it sometimes i am just pissy and i want to be. and so everyone else can be how they want to be. so to everyone who deletes comments out of anger just to prove a point, is ridiculous and to everyone who is upset about comments and doesn't do anything to solve but, bitch. that is ridiculous. you talk about it with me i then form an opinion. so there it is bullshit. if you are so righteous and want all energies and whatever to be along, then use the positivity to mend the issues, not make them worse and run away from them. i just truly want all of us to be there for each other, but we all need to make the effort. i am just not standing up for one person or falling into someone's trap. i am standing up for what i believe to be the best. if you can't see that then i am sorry. but some people just need to be told that enuff is enuff and go talk things our and make it better. i am pissed off that i am so far away. i want this to be better. but i guess someone out there will say to me. well, it's really not my business. but you know what i have made it my business. that's what i do i fix things, if you all don't like it . then you can kiss my ass. it pisses me off beyond belief that some act like we are in high school. get the truth before you react, please! and yea this isn't a nice blog and it is gonna piss someone off, but i have been waiting for so long, for things to just be ok. like how hard is that. realize that we are all different and will not conform to everything you want us to. just accept them for who they are and stand by them and show them in suggestive way to be more open and accepting. pushing your way on others is not the thing, trust me. so i hope this will open something up and get something solves. if not well i said my shit and that 's that. good nite.! and just because i said these things, doesn't mean i don't love everyone, it is just upsetting. so there take that positivity and shove it up your ass.
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11 comments:
ok so first off...who the hell do you think you are writing a blog like that!?! Are you serious!?!?! whatever! I'm so over it! ok..ok...I've had time to calm down and I can now talk to you like a rational adult... :) *tee-hee* Not sure what your blog is about, but i felt like putting my two cents in...Something I absolutely LOVE to do!!! Obviously someone has been talking about someone behind someones back. You see this was something I did a lot in high school, since then I have noticed that it is very difficult to solve the problem you have with this person, if you aren't speaking directly with them. I know that it is difficult to express yourself in a caring way to a friend that has "wronged" you or upset you. However, that is just it, this person was a friend or has been, and if so, you should be able to talk to them about anything, or atleast I feel that I can. Also, a friend is someone who you are supposed to support when they need a shoulder, help when they need assistance, laugh with when they need a good time, cry with when they need your comfort. This is a friend. A friend does not criticize you for being different from them, a friend does not make you feel bad about yourself, a friend does not leave you when you need them the most, a friend does not talk about you when you need one person in the whole world to be on your side. A friend believes in you, encourages you, supports you, and loves you regardless of your faults. The best thing about a friend though, is that they can tell you when you are messin' up, hurting yourself or others, and you can still love eachother the next day. That's what I think is a true friend. It's really too bad that whoever you are talking about in this has lost their true friends...
who know who the hell i am i love to meddle in everything. i am just upset that we as friends cannot do this rationally. so i had to get pissy and put in some imput, to make people realize, how ridiculous it is. and you are right. friends need to let friends know when they are messin up. it's how we protect each other, i just hope that they understand that is what i was doing. and yes i was serious, and you can't tell me what to do. so maybe i was harsh, but somebody needs to step up and say hey that's bullshit. we all have are struggles and what ever else. let each figure it out and be there to support no matter how you feel. because i want to grow with my friends, to become even better friends.
you know..we all keep talking about "how much we LOVE our friends" maybe if we keep saying it enough...we really will....then again, maybe the struggle to keep some friendships alive, just isn't worth it anymore....I'm with you though...eventhough I am the last to know what the hell is going on with everyone...I'm kinda over it as well...
yea it's hard with any relationship and you know when it brings you down so much, you need to let it go. if it has no worth to you let it go. if it was meant to be it will come back. but,sometimes you love someone so much and care and support them it's hard to let go. you just have to trust yourself. love isn't always going to work, especially if the person always thinks that their way is the only way. to be or not to be that is the question. i also do not believe on giving up on someone just because you can't take it anymore. so is that how we want to be just let it go when it gets tough. no only let it go when it no longer serves a purpose. no pun intended
people are who they are feeling emotions all the time good bad indifferent, i see its easier to accept then letting yourself be blogged (hehe) down in things, when, you really stop and take a minute to think about it whatever it may be, is usually someone else's feelings and that just needs to be accepted and ok. Because it sux spending energy on shit when you think the outcome you want is "im done"...its hurts the head!! But really TRUE HONEST friends DO say if theres something bothering them, and accept what is coming at them, and have the guts to say to the other person..to just stop, or lets just leave it be..if that's what needs to be done, everone needs to have a little love from their friends, and its true..ok im at the library and my eyes are starting to tear, and i cant see what im typing correctly..everybody is their own selves, and it's not meant to be judged or or critized anymore!! It's better to live and learn to love, then to just live and die.
Im not always completely honest, im striving to be, but when i think about shit, i realize that i know that i have everything i want and need, but what happens when what you need leaves you?? Something i didn't take into complete consideration which, it turns out, was the most important thing that i could have let my mind think about, but i didn't want to, so i faught it, i know now, and im lucky its not too late!! What im saying is if you are a true friend, just being there is the best thing a friend can ever offer. im trying not to have reagrets, but that was probably one of the most selfish, un-heartfelt thing i could ever do, and the fact that i am able to do that, well, it just worries me. will i do it again? can i be so cold hearted, and who am i fooling? The answers are inside me and let me tell you, just writing this makes me feel sick to my stomache.
Ive come to understand that everyone wont always agree, but really it doesn't call for gossip, or lying, or anthing harsh and stupid, we face these challenges together because we have grown up together basically, and i consider myself lucky to have friends who will say "Alicia, you need to think about this and calm the fuck down, because yer not seeing the truth" and its true, when we are hurt or upset, sometimes i focus on what hurt me and i use it like a weapon, its part of life and i hope we can all see that its all good, and i wana be a part of the awesomeness ok....ok...i feel like i just picked up a car and put it back down again!
it's good you saw what was really going on. it isnt' always about how "I" feel, it's about who it all involves, and getting all the facts straight, is so important. And you know this blog thing doesn't show emotion or anything, so maybe we need to not take what is written so personally and to the heart, understand what the other persons feels as well as yourslef.. acceptence is the key. we are all trying in this world to get to a good point in our lives, find out what we can do to make this world better. and it is good to have friends tell yo what's up sometimes. it brings forth another understanding, and until we all can get this, i dont' knoew. why can't we all just get along. oh and i love you all like from the bottom of ok i won't say anything silly, my heart.
dude you can chill out. I AM NOT proving any points per say.. i'm respecting the unseen boundaries. peace love unity RESPECT and that is what i will give people by respecting their wishes. it's all good. i don't play games i just love my friends. so i can erase any comment i make from any blog and it's not me being in high school. it's me choosing not to give my opinions where they are not wanted. it's part of my learning right now to let others be, i don't have to comment especially when i know how it's going to make me or them feel later. so whatever erin! i freakn love you but, i don't see how you feel like your placed in the middle of things. maybe you choose to be. and if thats what you want then great i respect that. and then this brings me to another thing. why can't i have a personal conversation with someone and have it be kept personal.. because apparently when this person talks to that person talks to this person..all of a sudden i'm immature when all i did was state my opinion to one person in confidence. i didn't say anything vindictive. and you know what, I have brought the core "issue" to the surface with EVERYONE invovled over and over again for years. so me sayin one thing to one friend in confidence and taking the action that I needed to take in order to not waste another ounce of energy is what works for me. and i'm not about to tip toe around any of it either. you have your perspective and i have mine AND ITS ALL OUT IN THE OPEN AND HAS BEEN FOR EVER.
and i love you and everyone else. amen.
hahahahaha!!!! ok since we are all being honest.... i poop A LOT! I wish I had the "everyone poops' book because I think it would be most appropriate displayed in my bathroom as well as t.d's... (she poops a lot too)
Man I'm so glad I'm not involved in this one...
ok i need to comment on t.d. i know we talked the other day and it was great, but what i didn't realize was the fact that your personal conversation with sierra had nothing to do with why i posted what i did. and for you to think i need to put my self in the middle. yea i do, because we are all friends and sometimes and outside point of view needs to step up and say hey that's enuff. i am sorry if you felt like your personal conversation was put out there, but it wasn't. it was about how she felt about what was done, not what was brought to attention to her, which was kind of bad on your part. i know this is soemwhat over now, but i had to state this, because by the time i would get to the phone, i think i would forget exactly my point. no hurt feelings, just thoughts to ponder and,k. and for everyone else who reads this, i believe that when one friend has a problem they should be able to get help from another if needed, hence having more that one friend.
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